Hit Song Review: "Wide Awake" by Katy Perry

            Katy Perry is, and has always been, incredibly lucky to be where she is. If nothing else, her story depressingly proves that a musician need not be fettered by lack of singing talent in their quest for the hit parade. Ms. Perry doesn’t strike me as particularly bright, nor particularly well-endowed vocally.

            That said, I have enjoyed a surprising number of her songs. “Hot n’ Cold,” “Teenage Dream,” and “Waking Up In Vegas” are all songs that, while decidedly not perfect, manage to find a nice balance between catchiness and actual songwriting merit. It’s a pity that they have to be sung by such a gasping, grating vocalist (illustrated below).

            She is also a decent lyricist (or co-lyricist, as I suspect is most often the case). Her verse is by no means revelatory, but by the dismal standards of pop music it might as well be Wordsworth.

            But enough about good music, let’s talk about “Wide Awake.” Katy Perry has been heading toward this for some time, ever since “E.T.” That song seemed to indicate that she had exhausted her store of hummable melodies, but at least it was weird enough not to be boring. Not so for “Part of Me,” a painfully tedious song with insultingly simple lyrics and a profoundly unmemorable tune. It’s not a terrible song, it just barely exists.

            “Wide Awake” is basically that, but a tiny bit more heartfelt (at least lyrically). Why did I waste most of this article talking about other Katy Perry songs? Because there is nothing interesting to say about “Wide Awake.” It is like an undiscovered planet, identifiable only by what surrounds it, conspicuous only in its absence.

Pop Song Limericks 8/17/2012

Some poetry this week, a series of limericks about the current top ten songs on the Billboard Hot 100. Why? Who knows...

1. Whistle by Flo Rida

As subtle as sci-fi Jane Fonda,

Flo’s song has still proved a golconda.

And although it’s not earned,

It’s still nice that he’s learned

The art of the single entendre.

2. Lights by Ellie Goulding

A song without deafening drumming,

But that still leaves the listener humming?

Oh, never before

Has this yank been more

Glad to say, “the British are coming!”

3. Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepsen

It’s had more than its share of success,

And yet stays in the charts nonetheless.

But you’ll find nothing’s there

But a wisp of hot air,

It seems we’re not hard to impress.

4. Wide Awake by Katy Perry

Though once she had hits in her hat,

These days it just tends to fall flat.

You could bear the buffoon

With a hummable tune,

Now she doesn’t even have that.

5. Payphone by Maroon 5 ft. Wiz Khalifa

Now, “Payphone,” inept as it is,

Has more whining than all of Les Mis,

And it all goes to pot

When we reach the guest spot,

An incongruous rap verse from Wiz.

6. Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye ft. Kimbra

In springtime it won all our hearts

With its mix of emotion and smarts.

It got played too much,

But it’s still great, as such

I’m happy it stays in the charts

7. Titanium by David Guetta ft. Sia

With music so thoroughly canned,

No surprise that it’s by Guetta’s hand.

But I’ll say this for it:

It’s been months since a hit

Has been quite so terribly bland.

8. Some Nights by fun.

Some thought fun.’s first hit was a gem,

But it was less flower than stem.

“Some Nights” is well-sung,

But unlike “We Are Young,”

This one sounds much more like them.

9. Home by Phillip Phillips

Now it’s been used as a theme

For the U.S.A. gymnastics team.

So the song’s won the day,

But the huge overplay

May dash Phillips’ Olympic dream.

10. Where Have You Been by Rihanna

Though in the past she’s been admired,

This hit leaves much to be desired.

Thing is, it’s no fun,

And you ask what they’ve done

To make her sound so uninspired.